Chapter XXVIII

he excitement filled Williams heart with joy and gladness.  Finally, it seemed as though fate had smile on him, and he was going to be out from under this Death Sentence of his soul.  He certainly didn't want to burn in a devils burning hell forever and ever, and neither did he want anyone else to be in torment.  That's something he wouldn't wish on his worst enemy.

But, he'd read the scripture where all unbelievers were to have their place in the lake of fire which burneth forever and ever.  So, he now believed.  How could God ever go back on His Word if he believed?

The Wednesday night had come and gone, he'd been baptized, and when he was taken under the water, he was so expectant. The preacher said "I now baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost.  When he came out of the water, he didn't feel anything but wet.

The disappointment that gathered on him seemed to intensify the weight of the death sentence.  His feelings were that he'd went down a dry sinner and come up a wet one.  So, this is religion . . .  this is what it means to be saved . . .  "Well, they can have it!" he thought.

He'd studied a lot about his situation, and decided he'd gotten all there was to get, and so now, that he was saved, he could get on with his life.  But, he still had some issues with the 'Ordeal' left to deal with.

And, he thought about his ordeal.  While he was thankful for the training he had received as a result of his relationship with Gilroy Hastings, he wasn't sure if it had been good for him or not.

Before he met Gilroy, his life was easy, he made good money, his career was going well, he had a position which would allow him to move up . . .  But his life had changed drastically since the purchase of the computer.

And now that the whole ordeal seemed to be over, sometimes he would wake up at night in a cold sweat and think he was right back in the middle of it again.  All the others, including Sharon, had not suffered as he had, and so they really couldn't relate to what he'd been through.

Depending on how he was feeling, sometimes he'd get depressed, sometimes he'd feel angry, sometimes he'd feel guilty and sometimes, he'd feel lonely and sad.  These last feelings always followed his reflections on his life with Sharon.  He didn't think anything could ever break them up, and here he was, lonely to the depth of depression, and depression to the depth of suicide.

He wanted his old life back.  Heck, he wanted his life back.  He had no means of income, had no means of getting to work if he did have a job.  He certainly didn't feel energetic enough to start a business, and didn't have the wherewithal had he wanted to.

He had been living here alone in his own little world now for about a month, and he was tired of it.  He had tried religion, and thought it all a bunch of hogwash.  He had listened to Lane, and had read the Bible, or, at least the Old Testament, and he found nothing in there that could satisfy the longing in his soul.  He was hungry for something he'd never experienced.

Suspense, danger, and intrigue certainly didn't satisfy the hunger in his heart.  He wanted that empty feeling to be filled.  But, most of all, he wanted the Death Sentence to be taken away.  He felt the cold hand of the grim reaper on his life everyday.  The thought that he was dying a little more each and every day scared him.  The thought that he was moving closer to the end of his own days unready scared him even more.

He wondered where Sharon was, and what he could say to her if he were to ever see her again.  For all he knew, she'd moved away and taken everything he'd given her.  Something Lane had told him the last time he saw him was the FBI was still wanting those disks.  He had simply put it out of his mind, and never thought about it again for a couple of weeks.  Then, he felt he wanted to do something about the disks.

But, he wasn't for sure if he had access to that house any longer.  He knew exactly where they were, and how to get to them, but, he didn't know if Sharon still owned the house or if she'd sold it.  He needed to talk to Lane and see what was going on.

He had shaved, cut his hair as best he could for the trip into town, put on his cleanest dirty clothes, and pedaled to Santa Barbara.  There, he'd chained his bike at a little restaurant a block or so away from Lanes office, then walked the rest of the way.  What the secretary saw when he presented, was an underweight, shaggy, dirty man she used to know as William Travis.  She was quite startled to see him, and invited him to sit, then poured him a cup of coffee after calling Lane.

Lane appeared almost immediately, and his expression changed from joy to shock as he saw William.  In an instant, the look turned back to joy, however forced, and he stuck out his hand to shake Williams.

"Hey man!  How've ya been!  Looks like you've been on a long journey," Lane said playfully.

"What an odd choice of words," thought William as he shook Lane's hand answered, "I'm fine.  I came in to make an appointment to see you when you're not too busy."

"I'm never too busy for you William.  I hope you know that.  Come on in.  Let's sit down and shoot the breeze a little." Lane was trying too hard to make William comfortable.

"Sandy, bring us in a couple of donuts, will ya?" Lane said over the intercom after seating William and taking his own seat. "And bring in a fresh carafe of coffee, too," he finished.

Within just a few minutes, the lovely and petite little brown head came in with a huge tray laden with donuts, bagels, muffins, coffee, and other condiments such as butter, honey, and sweet spread.  She smiled at William but the smile was not a natural smile.  It was a smile forced from concern.

"Man!' he thought.  "I must really look bad!"

"So, William, what have you been doing.  It has been a while, and we've had no connection with you whatsoever.  There are a few things of which you should be apprised.  And I need to line up another appointment with Dr. Randall to have that chip removed.  You missed the last appointment, and, you failed to make an appointment to retrieve the disks," Lane was talking almost too fast for William to follow.

William responded slowly, methodical, and minced no words.  "Well, I've been reading the Bible, I've been baptized, and, I've made the decision to give up on religion.  If that's all there is, then, it's worthless to me.  I need to know some things about Sharon and the house.  Did she sell it?"

"No, she didn't sell it, and she's not living there.  She hasn't taken possession of it either.  At this time, it is as you both left it, still has all your belongings in it.  She has not been to the house other than to spend the first week in it alone.  Len Mathers and Melinda Pierce did spend a night with her, hoping you'd come back, but, you know the rest of the story there."

"She wanted to talk to you and try to reconcile, but the only person you've talked to is me and Chief of Police Walter Bension.  You were very short with him.  Len won't even try to contact you but he knows where you are and what you're doing.  He contacts me and keeps me in the know about you."

Lane's intercom sounded and William heard Sandy say "Steven's here."

William felt like he was back into the ordeal again, only this time being stabbed in the back by a friend.  He stood up and said, "well, I guess I'll get out of your hair and quit taking your time.  I'm feeling like it might be better to talk via mail than try to get a little bit of help face to face."

He started toward the door and it opened just before he got a hold of the door handle.  It nearly hit him in the face.  He stepped back away from the door to allow who ever was coming in free access to the room. He looked into the eyes of a man he'd never met before. "Excuse me," William said.

He started past the man, and Lane spoke up. "William, before you go, I'd like you to meet my Pastor, Rev Steven Ritehouser. Pastor, this is William Travis."

Pastor Ritehouser, shook Williams hand, presented him with a card, and simply said "It's a pleasure to meet you.  Call me if I can ever be of service to you.  It doesn't matter what time of day it is.  It would be an honor to get to know you and help you in any way I can.  Lane speaks very highly of you.  Goodbye." He then walked over and took a seat beside where William had been sitting.

"Thanks for coming in William." Lane waved cheerfully as William looked back at him.  He then saw him motion to the donuts and said "why don't you take some donuts and a cup of coffee with you?"

"No thanks.  But, I'd really like to talk to you sometime when I can catch you alone.  I'm sorry about just dropping by without making an appointment.  I'll check with Sandy for an appointment.  Nice to meet you Pastor."

"I cleared all my appointments to spend the day with you William.  Now, my day is clear, but I'll have to work long hours the rest of the week catching up on all the ones I pushed back.  Won't you stay and help me clear up some problems?"

"I would appreciate it very much, but, while I certainly don't want to offend Pastor Ritehouser, of what I want to speak is private.  I don't want to talk to Bension, Mathers, or anybody else.  I want to talk to you.  Thanks for your time."

William walked out of the office carefully closing the door behind him, nodded to Sandy, and into fresh air of the ocean.  He soon retrieved his bike and pedaled toward the house in which he and Sharon shared.

What he would find would shake him to his core.

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